Superior Love through Superior Dhamma
Because we are human beings, none of us are perfect. We all come with a baggage of deficiencies. We can cope with our own deficiencies but we cannot tolerate someone else’s. This is the human condition. Once we start living with another person, our own deficiencies and those of our partner’s accumulate. How do we cope with the challenges that are part of a family life? We turn to the Dhamma for help.
In Dhamma for Householders, the Lord Buddha gave us valuable insights on how to deal with family issues. This Dhamma consists of four virtues: truthfulness, self-control, endurance and generosity. These are the four virtues that should be observed and practised if one wishes to live in this world with complete happiness and harmony. These virtues will allow the person to conduct his or her life morally and free from harm.
The Thai Buddhist forefathers have adopted a tradition that every man should be ordained as a monk at least once in his lifetime. This is such that he would have the opportunities to learn the Dhamma, to practise meditation, to be trained in discipline and to be a pure and refined individual This is truly a wonderful tradition.
Women are encouraged to attend religious sessions at the temple regularly. Married women should listen to Dhamma sermons simultaneously with their ordained husbands, so that both will absorb knowledge and perform good deeds as a team. This knowledge will prepare them to be better spouses and better parents for their children.
Children form an important part of a marriage. We must know how to take care of our children, not just physically, but morally and spiritually as well. Also, it is our responsibility to provide our children with both worldly and spiritual knowledge Worldly knowledge enables our children to earn a living and survive in this world. Spiritual knowledge shows them how to be good human beings and survive in samsara, the endless cycle of existence.
Once we have provided our children with worldly education and spiritual knowledge through the Dhamma, and have conditioned them to do good deeds regularly, we can be sure that they will grow up to be wonderful adults who are capable of bringing pride and prosperity to the family.
Handling our love is like holding a little bird in our palm. It should be handled gently; not too loose or it will fly away, and not too tight or it will suffocate. Also, we should apply the practice of sharing, saying only kind words to one another, showing selflessness and maintaining the consistency of our relationship with our spouse.
Source: thebuddhism.net (Oct. 5, 2013)
